this is my life

Some days, we are go, go, go. Other days, we enjoy a break of snuggling and cuddling together. But there are some days when we just have to do what we have to do. Things that we want to do, things that we don't. We have to tend to the needs of ourselves and others. Balance. Its something that I think that our house could use more of.

my life

Today was one of those days when I felt like I was pulled in way too many different directions all at one time. I have been stressed, I have been feeling low, I have been snappy at the littles, and unhappy with myself. I haven't been doing things because I *want* to do them but going through the motions because I *have to*. Or at least, I feel that I have to.

I think that after this week, SweetPea and I will be taking a break from lessons. They are turning into a battleground between her and I and I don't like that. I think that we are both getting burnt out and really need a chance to reconnect with each other before going forward. I really wanted to push forward next week and do "just one more letter" before vacation but honestly? She's four. Taking three weeks off in the middle of our time together isn't going to damage her in the least. Maybe it will give us both a boost out of this black pit of lethargy that we are sitting in together.

Speaking of breaks, I better enjoy them while I have the chance. Starting after vacation, Punk will be back in soccer two days a week. Him and Pickle both will have track meets once a week and practice three to four other days. SweetPea will still have her weekly dance class but we will be getting ready to add in picture days and recital talk. Not to mention that she wants to take soccer again this summer, which starts in June. Now I just need to find something for Peanut to do other than mope around the house because we will be focusing so much on the other kids.

I know that it doesn't seem like being on the go with sports so much will be a balance but for me, it will force me to re-prioritize about what's really important. And who knows? Maybe I will find some peace in getting back to being an active family instead of a lazy one.